Comments on: The tweet that reached 45,000 people http://lightfooted.ca/2009/10/the-tweet-that-reached-45-000-people/ Fitness for your Everyday, REAL Life Wed, 11 May 2011 09:53:23 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: canucklehead http://lightfooted.ca/2009/10/the-tweet-that-reached-45-000-people/comment-page-1/#comment-6 canucklehead Sun, 04 Oct 2009 04:31:13 +0000 http://lightfooted.ca/?p=37#comment-6 This attack on harmless, helpless and ultimately cute (if useless) urban hipsters by the mean arrogant roadie is reprehensible. Please donate generously to the Society for Hipster Ideal Transportation Solution to help prevent such attacks in the future and sustain the delicate balance of urban ecosystems. If measures are not taken to preserve the hipsters in their pristine environment, they may mutate into various invasive and damaging species, from yuppies (workaholized hipsters) to gangstas (criminalized hipsters) to the so-called "performance" jocks. The last one is a particularly dangerous sort of mutation, in which the hipster's locomotion system (informally referred to as "fixie") grows a cluster of several gears. In the worst-case scenario, the natural hipster's coat may also undergo a shocking change: tight jeans, plaid shirts and old-school sneakers are replaced by distinctly alien neon-coloured lycra attire and clickety shoes. An ugly mushroom-shaped growth often appears on the head. It may at first be perceieved as a positive development that gives hipsters an evolutionary advantage, allowing them to travel further and faster. However, this inevitably leads to the expansion of the mutated hipsters areal: from the selected hotspots in the downtown core to at least midtown and often beyond. Such radical expansion may lead to the collapse of midtown and inner suburbs. In extreme cases, these dangerous mutants may even travel well beyond the urban and suburban limits, and are sometimes seen (typically in packs) on country roads. Help preserve the urban hipster for our children and grandchildren! Call 1-800-12S-HITS today to find out how YOUR money can save this majestic animal (yes, we DO take PayPal). This attack on harmless, helpless and ultimately cute (if useless) urban hipsters by the mean arrogant roadie is reprehensible. Please donate generously to the Society for Hipster Ideal Transportation Solution to help prevent such attacks in the future and sustain the delicate balance of urban ecosystems. If measures are not taken to preserve the hipsters in their pristine environment, they may mutate into various invasive and damaging species, from yuppies (workaholized hipsters) to gangstas (criminalized hipsters) to the so-called “performance” jocks. The last one is a particularly dangerous sort of mutation, in which the hipster’s locomotion system (informally referred to as “fixie”) grows a cluster of several gears. In the worst-case scenario, the natural hipster’s coat may also undergo a shocking change: tight jeans, plaid shirts and old-school sneakers are replaced by distinctly alien neon-coloured lycra attire and clickety shoes. An ugly mushroom-shaped growth often appears on the head.

It may at first be perceieved as a positive development that gives hipsters an evolutionary advantage, allowing them to travel further and faster. However, this inevitably leads to the expansion of the mutated hipsters areal: from the selected hotspots in the downtown core to at least midtown and often beyond. Such radical expansion may lead to the collapse of midtown and inner suburbs. In extreme cases, these dangerous mutants may even travel well beyond the urban and suburban limits, and are sometimes seen (typically in packs) on country roads.

Help preserve the urban hipster for our children and grandchildren! Call 1-800-12S-HITS today to find out how YOUR money can save this majestic animal (yes, we DO take PayPal).

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